One of the reasons why so many people in this world cannot feel inner peace is because they hold on to worldly obsessions. Obsession can come in the form of love with regards to spouse or in the form of hate for an ex-spouse. It can come in the form of greed for people seeking wealth or status, or vanity for people seeking external beauty and attachments to their body.
There are even people who have healthy habits but because they have such a strong attachment to being healthy, it becomes detrimental for them as an obsession.
Whenever we seek too much of something, it can become an obsession. And as long as we are obsessed with that “something”, we can never have peace within.
The sad truth is, the more you are obsessed with something, the harder it is to be satisfied with it. Think of your friend. The one that keeps talking about their ex. Although they may feel hatred for their ex, they can’t stop talking about them because that part of their brain is obsessed with them. This is what it means to live as a slave to your emotions.
Repressing obsessive thoughts with therapy, medication, or willpower is futile. It does not work because those thoughts are still passively moving in the brain. They are not gone, just pushed down. With meditation, there is a way to stop pushing those thoughts down. There is a way to bring them to the surface and then completely set them free from the mind altogether. When we are free from the obsessive mind, we can truly achieve inner peace.
Obviously, your friend knows that this is an unhealthy person in their life and they know they should move on, but their minds have been over-taken by this thought, this obsession, and it cannot let go of the thought “what if?”
I too had my own obsessions. I had certain desires and wants which cycled through chronic obsessive patterns of thought. The best thing that ever happened to me was trying this meditation. I learned to stopped living as a slave to my emotions once I discarded my obsessions. My strong attachments gradually disappeared. My anxiety about money also disappeared. I finally found calmness and peace within.
The irony was that after I discarded my desire for money, without that attachment, it was easier for me to make more money and achieve things I was not able to achieve before. Now is the time for you and I to live free from obsession. There is no reason to live with an obsessive mind that prevents us from achieving what we can achieve. And that one friend, tell him or her to do it too!